


Whiskey Lullaby

by Kastie_Novak_Winchester



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Depression, Drinking, F/M, Foul language(just to be safe), Ignored (signs ie. Depression, M/M, Mentions of Suicide, Mourning, Smoking, thoughts/actions)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-18
Updated: 2017-08-18
Packaged: 2018-12-16 21:06:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11837070
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kastie_Novak_Winchester/pseuds/Kastie_Novak_Winchester
Summary: Sam is left by the reader and his actions lead to him doing the unthinkable. Dean blames reader, reader blames herself and slowly sinks into her own worthlessness. She to does something unthinkable but in the ned who is to blame, cas thinks readers actions, in the end, are his own fault, how could he not see the recouring actions?





	Whiskey Lullaby

You and Sam were going great there for a while, but something just hadn't felt right. You loved him, you really did but you felt empty, incomplete. Like the spark you both had was gone, were you just bored? didn't matter, you wanted a break and you thought it was the best way to go. you kicked him out of your house, since he had moved in of course, you told him you would call, would text or give him a sign when you felt ready.

_She put him out like the burnin' end of a midnight cigarette_ _She broke his heart, he spent his whole life tryin' to forget_

 

Months flew by, he waited at the phone, sat there and drank, thinking that what if he had called you just to check in. you were a hunter, what if he was waiting on nothing... "no, nonsense, (y/n) is the best." he lied to himself so he would push on. he loved you. always had always will and he knew it would only stop the day he died, maybe not even then.

 

__We watched him drink his pain away a little at a time__ _But he never could get drunk enough to get her off his mind_  
_Until the night_

 

_ **Dean's P.O.V:** _

 

I can't believe ( y/n) did that to him, years of togetherness and out of nowhere she dropped him like a dime on the side walk. Now, ten years later, she didn't bother a single call or text, she didn't bother checking in to at least let us know she was alive I blew it off but Sam.. oh my poor Sammy. She had broken him. His habit, diet and soul purpose became a sorrowed bottle of jack and a royal gin to chase it. Cas an I watched in pain as we watched him sink lower and lower. 

 

That night... it was now two years since he had done it... I just... the scene I wasn't ready for it. We had gone to a bar... Sam called in early, i figured he was tired... I didn't know. When I got home that night I was too drunk to notice anything and well... it hurt but I went and slept through it all. 

 

_He put that bottle to his head and pulled the trigger_ __And finally drank away her memory_ _ _Life is short, but this time it was bigger_ _Than the strength he had to get up off his knees_ _We found him with his face down in the pillow_ _With a note that said, 'I'll love her till I die.'_ _And when we buried him beneath the willow_ _The angels sang a whiskey lullaby_

 

I woke to the horrid scene... I wanted to scoop him up, clean him up, make it all better pray for Cas to heal him but... Sam was gone. No more and no less, I saw the bottle, the silencer... his face was buried to hide his tears, weakness and screams, The note, the note was the deal breaker. I lost my cool in a fit of rage and loss... she did this (y/n) (y/l/n) did this. I hope she hates herself. I hope she dies, I hope...I hope... I need to calm down before I call her that is for sure.

 

_ **(Y/N) P.O.V:** _

 

I got that call from Dean that morning. He had been crying, his voice was hoarse and broken, he slurred a bit so he had definitely been drinking and I was unsure why.  
"Hey dean, what's wrong, are you guys okay?" His response shook me hard and broke me deep within.  
"No... we aren't...(y/n), Sam killed himself. He is dead and I called to let you know where we are having his funeral in a a few hours."  
I almost dropped my phone, I held in a choked sob and tears started to pour down my face as my body shook, there was no way this was happening... why? Why did I have to push him so far, keep him so close yet so far and now... he wasn't there at all to push or pull.  
"D..dean... I... I'm sorry.. i should have called or something. " of course he yelled at me, cursed me.. and everything else before giving me the address and hour. to say the least i was done, but what i was and wanted didn't matter. 

 

_**Dean's P.O.V.** _

 

When we buried Sam, I gave him a final goodbye... I gave him a peaceful funeral. No, I didn't burn him; I should have and I couldn't, I wanted the possibility of coming back to be available but for now, I would leave him, at least until I was sure that she would be forgotten if he did come back. I tasted vinegar in my throat when I asked, but I asked her to come back with me... i didn't need her but she was taking this hard for someone who hated the one person who loved her most in this god forsaken world.

 

_[la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la] 2x_

 

_The rumors flew but nobody knew how much she blamed herself_

 

__For years and years she tried to hide the whiskey on her breath_ _

 

_**Cas' P.O.V.** _

  
(y/n) was weak, she was always sleeping, drinking and she rarely ate. she cried and if she hunted, she wasn't just killing the creature she was over killing it, like she was taking her anger out. she always had a cough drop... if she was interrogating she always played it off as she was sick.  (cough drops cover up the smell of alcohol on the breath, just a random fact for those who don't know)

_She finally drank her pain away a little at a time_ _But she never could get drunk enough to get him off her mind_ _Until the night_ _She put that bottle to her head and pulled the trigger_ __And finally drank away his memory._ _ __Life is short, but this time it was bigger_ _ _Than the strength she had to get up off her knees._ _We found her with her face down in the pillow_ _Clinging to his picture for dear life_

 

I promised dean I would stay and watch out for her... but I just guess i was more tired than I thought. I slept through her demise, the gun shot, her cries... I left her to have her privacy, I thought it was what humans craved most, but I messed up and didn't save her, how could I have thought she was okay when she was distant for so long... she...I thought she had found her way to move on but I was wrong. I found her, her face down in the pillow, his pictures gathered to her chest as if they would heal the bullet wound. 

 

__We laid her next to him beneath the willow_ _ __While the angels sang a whiskey lullaby_ _

  
**_Dean's POV_**

when Cas told me what had happened, I couldn't believe it, both of them now gone. I mustered what sanity I had left and with a heavy heart, helped bury her next to Sammy. They were together again, now in death, but I know for a fact that they share the same heaven and they are in fact happy. Castiel visits them every now and then without them knowing, telling me how they are and that they are safe, in which calms me a bit, I still worry and so does he. They are happy, so are we... and that's all that matters in the end.

_[la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la] 2x_

 

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, i just wanted to say citisism is welcomed, good or bad and im totally taking requests now! Please leave any ideas for me and ill do my best 
> 
> Song: whiskey lullaby- brad paisley


End file.
